Chapter 1: The Impact of Non-Verbal Communication

In a recent workshop, I found myself flailing my arms around as if attempting to ward off invisible insects. As part of my job in a media organization, I was sent to a seminar in London focused on body language. My body language coach provided me with some harsh but valuable critiques.

I quickly realized that, despite my passion for effective communication, my gestures often contradicted my verbal messages. Here’s what I uncovered about the subtle influence of hand gestures.

The Unseen Influence of Hand Gestures

Hand gestures, though frequently overlooked, play a crucial role in shaping how we are perceived. Research by Dr. Albert Mehrabian indicates that approximately 55% of our communication is non-verbal. While I may question the exact percentage, it’s clear that a significant portion of our messages is conveyed without words.

Having grasped this concept, I returned to my workplace with a renewed focus on my hand movements.

My Revelatory Experience

During a brainstorming session for our radio campaign, I observed Jane from the sales team. She utilized her hands as much as her words, exuding an infectious energy that drew others in. Her self-assurance and openness were impressive—her gestures truly led the way.

1. The Open Palms Gesture

Why It Works:

Open palms symbolize honesty and transparency, making you appear more trustworthy.

When to Use It:

Employ this gesture when discussing something crucial or when posing difficult questions, such as, “What innovative strategies can we employ to address this issue?” I found it effective when proposing new show concepts to the breakfast team, who often struggled to generate fresh ideas.

2. The Steepled Fingers

Why It Works:

This gesture, where fingertips touch while palms remain apart, conveys confidence and authority.

When to Use It:

It’s particularly suitable during serious conversations or negotiations. For instance, when discussing challenges within the team, you might ask, “How do we prevent this radio presenter from causing a scandal?”

3. The Double-Handed Handshake

Why It Works:

This gesture enhances a traditional handshake, signaling genuine interest and openness. Using both hands to shake adds warmth to your greeting.

When to Use It:

It’s perfect for introductions or when connecting with new colleagues. I used it with a new board director who was visiting, but I wouldn’t recommend adding a wink—I was told it came across as too familiar.

The 60-Second Connection

How One Question Can Revolutionize Your Random Meets

Crafting Your Hand Gesture Vocabulary

Just as we formulate powerful questions in coaching, being intentional with our gestures is essential:

• Consistency is Key: Ensure your gestures align with your words to reinforce your message.
• Be Natural: While mindfulness is important, overthinking can lead to awkwardness. Find a natural rhythm.
• Mirror and Match: Subtly mirroring another person’s gestures can foster trust, but do so with discretion.

When Hand Gestures Misfire

I once asked my radio team, “Who has an innovative solution for our audience challenge?” while performing an exaggerated windmill gesture. It was a humbling reminder of the importance of intentionality in communication.

Practical Tips for Effective Gesturing

1. Practice in Front of a Mirror: Observe how your gestures complement your speech.
2. Record Yourself: Playback can reveal discrepancies between your gestures and verbal messages.
3. Seek Feedback: Request input from colleagues about any distracting gestures.

These strategies will enhance your ability to build trust in your interactions.

You’ve Got This

I’ve authored “The Imposter Syndrome” on Audible and enjoy coaching, local radio, and spending time with my cat, Walter.

The first video, 7 Powerful Hand Gestures You Should Be Using, provides insights into effective gestures that can enhance your communication skills.

The second video, The Power of Hand Gestures, explores the significance of hand gestures in making meaningful connections.