Chapter 1: The Journey to Break Bad Habits

I successfully overcame three destructive habits that had a significant hold on my life.

1. My excessive gaming consumed far too much of my time.
2. I indulged in reading fiction books to the extent that I was losing sleep, often reading late into the night when I had to wake up early for work.
3. I spent countless hours watching mindless television.

While I didn’t entirely eliminate these habits, I learned to limit my engagement with them. How did I manage this?

Essentially, a habit is a sequence of neural pathways in the brain comprising a trigger, a routine, and a reward. When a cue appears, the routine kicks in, and the activity continues until the endpoint or reward is reached.

To genuinely break a habit, one must carefully reconstruct the routine. Although it's possible to alter the reward slightly, changing the trigger is much more challenging. Thus, the key to breaking free lies in identifying the trigger and consciously substituting a different action that yields a similar outcome.

If this sounds complicated, consider an example from Charles Duhigg, author of "The Power of Habit":

Understanding My Triggers

In my case, the triggers for my habits were intertwined with feelings of existential emptiness, frustration, and boredom. It's common for negative habits to stem from internal emotional states rather than external circumstances.

In simpler terms, I was using games, books, and TV as a means of escaping my reality. The specific escape route depended on what was readily available at the moment.

I often played Civilization IV on my work laptop, which was my only computer at the time. I played during my commute and, when possible, at work. My wife disapproved of my gaming, so I typically played at home when she was asleep or away.

Television was something I primarily enjoyed with my wife, while my reading habit was more sporadic, depending on the availability of interesting books.

The underlying issue was that I felt a lack of purpose in my life, and I was frustrated with how my life was unfolding. With nothing meaningful to do, I frequently found myself bored, triggering my negative habits.

Chapter 2: The Shortcut to Breaking Bad Habits

To break a habit, one must change the actions taken after the trigger. However, I didn’t modify my habits; instead, I eliminated the triggers altogether.

In the fall of 2012, I encountered a book that inspired me to transform my life. I discovered a new aspiration: to become a writer. I dedicated myself to self-improvement, which gave my life newfound meaning.

With less existential vacuum and frustration, my engagement with all three negative habits significantly reduced within a couple of months. I drafted a personal mission statement reflecting my writing ambitions and tracked my activities for two weeks. This made me acutely aware of how much time I wasted on my old escape routes. I intensified my focus on pursuing my dreams.

As my feelings of helplessness and boredom faded, so did my negative habits, as I became engrossed in writing.

Pros of the Shortcut Approach

The advantages of this method are clear. I managed to virtually eliminate three bad habits in just a few months. The only other method as effective as this is hypnosis, assuming it is performed correctly and one is open to it.

Typically, it takes over two months to establish a new habit, and reshaping an existing one requires even more time because of the resistance built over months or years. Most people struggle to focus enough to modify their habits, which is why successful habit changes, especially for severe addictions, are rare. I bypassed this arduous process by focusing my energy on cultivating new positive habits while inadvertently allowing my negative habits to fade.

Another benefit is that by not practicing my bad habits, I didn’t reinforce them. They diminished over time. While still embedded in my brain, their grip weakened.

Cons of the Shortcut Approach

However, the drawbacks of this approach are less evident. The primary downside is that you don’t genuinely break your bad habits; you merely put them on hold. They remain ingrained in your brain, and if the triggers return, so do the habits.

I stopped gaming primarily because I was preoccupied with writing. Even when boredom and frustration struck, I didn’t have my favorite game readily available.

Yet, my binge-reading tendencies resurfaced a few times over the years. This connects to another negative habit I developed as a teenager: reading captivating books in one sitting.

Back then, with little else to do, it was easy to dedicate hours to a book. Nowadays, that’s not the case. About three months ago, I found myself bored with my day job and browsing Amazon’s fantasy section for a client. I stumbled upon a ridiculous book about a half-squirrel girl. I read a sample at work, purchased the book, and ended up reading it until 4:30 in the morning.

While I’m still prone to gaming, binge-reading, and mindless TV-watching, I only engage in these activities occasionally because I manage to avoid my emotional triggers most of the time.

However, when those triggers reappear, I find myself slipping back into my old habits automatically, losing track of time in front of the TV, and waiting for commercials to end. If I’m particularly bored or frustrated, I end up staring blankly at the screen.

I don’t believe I’ve ever consciously broken a bad habit. My successes relate more to avoiding triggers and starving my vices.

Conclusion: Awareness is Key

This route may be the quickest path to success, but it’s essential to acknowledge the downsides. You’re not truly free from your habits; they remain dormant. If you allow yourself to believe that you have iron willpower, you may find that when the triggers return, your bad habits will resurface with a vengeance.

Stay vigilant about your triggers and avoid them, but don’t let the illusion of infallibility creep into your mind. Recognizing that your weaknesses are merely dormant will enable you to defend against them when they arise.

Originally published on Quora.com.